rachel
my name is melissa and I am homeless. I
dont know what homeless means though. I go to school
with my friends up in the hotel room like they call it and
we sit and talk all day. I heard that sometimes when you
go to school there is a big round window where the sun comes
in and shines. but the sun dont shine in my room.
we dont have no lights and my sister sits next to
me. shes only three and im five so I have to
take care of her like mama says. mama shes never here
because she always busy trying to ask some pepol for something
we dont got. mama hadnt been home for a long
time now and my sister she sit beside me always and asks
me when mama going to come back. she hardly can talk yet
but she listen to me though. I tell her that mamall
be back but I dont think she will though. mama dont
feel to good and we dont got no daddy so my sister
still sit with me in the corner and the light dont
shine.
I heard one of those people that live around
here about something I cant remember what they
call it. old man upstairs say that its a day when a
big fat man laughs and gives out presents. I never seen
a fat man before cause everyone round here is real thin
like. old man can see his bones and I ask him what a
present is. he the only one that can remember round
here so he tell me thats when someone spend money to
give something to you for free and you dont have
to pay for it. I dont think ill get a present
then because my sister dont have no money.
money is a butiful thing though. my sister
she once found what old man call a penny. it was round
and shiny. we save up five pennys and I put them in
my pocket for good luck. they make noise in there. old
man say that you find a hundred of them and you get
a dollur. I dont know what a dollur is so I ask
him evry day if I have one yet. its real hard to find
pennys so I dont ever think ill have a dollur.
yesturdy I went upstairs to see old man
but there wont nothing in his room. I saw a rat
on the floor but that was all. lady across there say
old man pass away. I ask her what pass away mean and
she say that he found a better place to live where everything
made of good stuff and theres lots of money. I ask her
if it was made of lots of pennys and she say yes lots
of them. I say to her I want to pass away to but she
say that I dont want to.
my sister she always sit in the corner.
she talk to me but she dont ever leave the room.
I tell her about old man and she say she hope she bring
back some pennys for her to see. she likes pennys lots
so I go find some for her. there wont much pennys
so my sister she play with her cat. mama told me how
to spell cat befor she went away so I no what a cat
is. I dont never have to feed cat food because
cat got lots of food. I tell cat not to eat all the
rats but cat eat it anyway. cat get more to eat than
my sister do but we cant catch no rats. cat never
stay with us but to go sleep then one day we never saw
cat again. lady across the room she say she eat the
cat. she real thin than me so she eat the cat. my sister
she got sad. everyone always sad but my sister I dont
want her to be sad. mama she told me what love was before
she went away so I tell my sister what love was. I love
my sister lots.
my sister she dont got no name. my
name is melissa but everyone call me little girl. dont
nobody no my name I think. I dont no anyone else
name either.
today the men in the good clothes came
and put old lady in my room. my sister sit in the corner
as always and watch them come in. the door broke off
when they closed it so now we dont have no door.
it got real cold then. old lady she was real nice but
she wave her hands around lots and she dont ever
look at us when she talk. but she talk lots though.
old lady say her name was rachel. she got real white
hair and she smile a lot. she ask my name and I told
her my name. I say my sister dont got no name
but she smile anyway.
rachel she was real nice. she say she cant
see but she do fine though. she take care of both of
us and no how to catch the rats even though she cant
see. she sing for us too when we go to sleep on the
floor at night. but befor we go to sleep she sits on
her knees and folds her hands and whispers something.
I ask her what she doing and she says that she praying
to God. then I ask her who God is and she says that
He loves us all and that if you pray to him He answers
you. I think my room is the best room in this place
because when you look straight up you can see the stars.
the men in the good clothes dont never fix the
ceiling anyway so we all look up at the stars. I dont
know what stars are but they real pretty. we get plenty
of water in here when it rain and everyone come in here
to get some when it rain because they dont got
no water in their room. but it get real cold sometime
and we all lay over each other to keep warm. I felt
real cold so me and my sister we prayed to God befor
we went to sleep. I had so many things to pray about
that I prayed myself to sleep. I wonder if God heard
me because I didnt want to wake rachel. I wonder
if hed answer me because I hope he would. rachel
she says he would so I felt happy.
rachel she tell stories to us at night
befor we go to sleep. she tell us things I never seen
like how if you get three dollurs you can buy a hamburger.
I never seen a hamburger but she tell me what it look
like though. she say it taste real good and it make
your mouth water but my mouth too dry to water. I always
thought that water come from the sky and that the men
in the good clothes always lied when they say water
comes from things called pipes. my mouth dont
ever water. rachel she tell us about the outside. we
never seen that either. she tell us what trees look
like even though she cant see but we see them
in our heads. she tell us all about the world and how
big it is so that we always have good dreams at night.
then she tell us about how everyone on
the outside wear good clothes. I ask her if they all
as mean as the men that wear good clothes round here
but she say that other people are nice. she tell us
what happy mean and what laffing is and she laff for
us to hear. I think laffing is a funny sound because
no one laff round here and no one sing either. no one
happy but rachel. I think maybe im happy too but
I dont no for sure.
rachel she getting real thin now. she cant
catch no rats no more. light dont never shine
in here and rachel cant see but she always no
when the sun is up and when the sun is down. she tell
us about familys and mamas and daddys but I tell her
I dont got no family because I dont have
a daddy and my mama gone. rachel tell us she would be
our mama and I think I was happy then cause she smile
and she real nice to us. I told her that I love her
too.
then one day my sister she got up and walked
out the room. she say rachel showed her how to walk
so she met all the mans and all the ladys that live
round here. everyone real nice to her and she made lots
of frends.
the men in the good clothes gave us some
food today. me and my sister we were out walking and
rachel in the room when they put the food in. rachel
she cant catch no rats so the rats ate the food.
we were real hungry then.
rachel she told us a story tonight about
the day when everyone give presents. she always tell
good stories so we can understand them. my sister she
sit in rachel lap just like rachel was our mama and
listened to the story. rachel say that a big man named
santa clos come down the chimney and gives presents
to all the good children. I say that santa clos cant
come because we dont have no chimney but rachel
she say that he come anyway because we were good and
we didnt do nothing wrong. rachel say that after
tomorrow santa clos came but I dont know what
tomorrow means or today or yesturdy so I dont
know. rachel she tell us the story and we all listen.
she say that she had a present to give
us even though she dont have no money. rachel
she reach in her pocket and pull out a ten dollur bill
she call it. she say that theres a thousand pennys in
that bill and I dont even no what a thousand is
but she say that its a lot of pennys more than
you can count. it dont look like there were any
pennys in there, but she say so and I gave it to my
sister. rachel she say she love us a lot just like we
were her family and then we all fell asleep under the
stars again.
the next morning it was cold and I woke
my sister up. rachel she was asleep and she wouldnt
wake up so I let her sleep. everyone they were hungry
especialy me because the rats eat my food and I took
my sister round the place to say something to her frends.
the rats they looked real happy maybe because they were
giving presents. maybe rats care for each other more
than people do because the men in the good clothes they
didnt come to visit us today yet. me and my sister
were cold and we went back to our room but rachel she
was gone. everyone they looked real sad like they always
do but today they looked sadder than they usualy do.
I ask the lady where rachel was at and she say that
rachel she pass away too. she say everyone here passing
away. I ask her she coming back isnt she? but
lady she say no. she tell me that rachel gone off to
a better place. I was angry that rachel didnt
take me with her and she didnt say goodbye. I
wished I could pass away too. my sister she missed her
real bad and I thought I heard God walking in the room
so I prayed real hard and asked him to make sure that
rachel is real happy and has lots of money. I hope rachel
says hello to old man for me because I didnt tell
him goodby before he pass away. I miss rachel lots too
and me and my sister we both prayed to God even though
we hadnt seen him yet and then we went to sleep.
today was the day that santa clos came
but we didnt see him. I wished rachel was here
so she could tell us stories again. the men in the good
clothes they came and gave us some food and we were
real happy. the rats they didnt get none this
time. we eat the food and felt better but it was real
cold and my sister she didnt go walking today.
it was real dark in the room today and I waited for
santa clos to come but he didnt never come but
the men in the good clothes came back though. then there
was a nice lady who gave me and my sister blankets and
told me that she was rachel friend and she would give
us a house to live in. I ask her what a house was and
maybe she didnt know because she cryed and she
gave me a hug. but she say that we were going outside
and that rachel she wanted you to have a good house
with trees and where the sunlight shines. so me and
my sister we went outside.
I thought I passed away when I saw the
sun outside because it was so butiful. me and my sister
we went with the nice lady and she say her name was
rachel too because she related to rachel. she told us
what a car was because we never seen one befor but it
wasnt wet or hard but soft. there were lots of
trees and it was warm in the car and me and my sister
we were real happy. I think that maybe God was with
me in the car because I was real happy. I still never
seen him but I think he still there anyway. I love God
and my sister she do too. rachel she didnt have
no money but she love us and I pray that night and told
her hello. rachel the nice lady she give my sister a
name and she call her rachel too because she like that
name. me and my sister we went to sleep and we prayed
to God. I think he heard us because hes special.
thats the best present I ever had.
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